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你是李华, 你很烦恼.最近,每天早晚, 你们小区广场上都有很多人在跳广场舞,持续...

你是李华, 你很烦恼.最近,每天早晚, 你们小区广场上都有很多人在跳广场舞,持续时间长且噪音大, 给你和小区里其他人带来了很多不便......请你给小区委员会领导写封信,反映现象及其导致的不便(要求涉及生活,学习和工作等方面) 并提出合理建议.

注意: 1. 词数 120左右

2. 短文的开头 和结尾已给出,不计入总词数.

参考词汇: 广场舞 square dance       组织者 organizers

Dear Sir,

I'm writing to tell you something about the people doing the square dance in our community, which has made me terribly upset.

__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Best wishes.

Sincerely yours,

Li Hua

 

Recently, every morning and evening, many people gather to dance in our community square, which does help to keep healthy. However, the long-time dancing and noise pollution caused by the loudspeaker really bring about unbearable inconveniences. We can't rest or sleep well. As a result, the students are not only late for school but also sleepy in class, and the workers are easily tired out while working. Here are some suggestions to solve the problem. They are supposed either to shorten the dancing time and reduce the music noise or to make another choice of dancing places. Only in this way can they have fun and let others enjoy life. Would you please communicate with the organizers about what I said? 【解析】本文为提纲式作文。要点有:1. 小区广场上都有很多人在跳广场舞,持续时间长且噪音大, 给你和小区里其他人带来了很多不便2.提出合理建议. 写作步骤:1. 确定人称,时态。 2. 确定要点 3. 列提纲 点睛: 使用从句提升句子: which does help to keep healthy.定语从句 分词作状语使句子简洁:the long-time dancing and noise pollution caused by the loudspeaker really bring about unbearable inconveniences. 巧妙使用连接词:the students are not only late for school but also sleepy in class, and the workers are easily tired out while working.使用not only。。。 but also They are supposed either to shorten the dancing time and reduce the music noise or to make another choice of dancing places. Either。。。 or 等 使用高级句式:Here are some suggestions to solve the problem.完全倒装 Only in this way can they have fun and let others enjoy life.部分倒装  
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文中共有10处语言错误。每处错误仅涉及一个单词的增加、删除或修改。

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2. 只允许修改10处,多者(从第11处起)不计分。

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